Wednesday, April 27, 2005

Slumbery Agitation

I want to complain about how I can't sleep. It's not so much that I can't sleep but finding time to do so. So much has happened in a few days. I shall fill you in.....
Friday I went to a BBQ with Erick, it was fun. I have never ate so many huge cookies and rootbeer floats in one sitting, lol. Well apperently now people think we are together, ha that's funny. I love Erick to Death but we already went through that lil fase and now it's over, it's been over and Unlike jesus, It will not come back from the grave, at least not to my knowlege.
Saturday, another BBQ but my family, and as usual, they presume we are together, Why don't they think stuff like that with Jose?? Oh yea, cuz they all know I don't like him like that. My cousin was presenting Erick, and asked if he was "just" a friend, uh yeah.. Thats' how it starts, he says. Ok. But before we went to the BBQ I had gone to work, joy. Ahh, and then when me and Erick left, we saw Kevin. God I despise him somethimes. My heart felt like it was going to fall out and go into cardiac arrest. Crazy how you can feel like that just by seeing some one. As much as I try to deny it, I can't forget what we have been through, and undoubtibly, I will always have feeling for him, they may not be the same as they once were, but hey, hatred is a feeling, lol Moving on...
Sunday, I was really tired, like all day, I didn't go to sleep untill alot later than i had expected, I was talking to Jose all night. Have you ever heard news from someone that just for some reason makes the rest of your day, in my case night, feel like crap. Ya thats what happened to me. It feel like a sort of deception.. But ya know what, It's ok, it's not like that person was, ok wait that is not going to make sense, so I might as well not say
Maybe because it was a busy weekend, is why I had like no sleep. I have made the decision to not accept restricted calls. It may sound weird, but there had been this guy who calls in the middle of the night, asking me what underwear I'm wearing, and it's really freaking me out!! Ya one day he called out of the blue like at 2 in the morning, and He admitted he had the wrong number, but he still calls. Can you say PSHYCO!!
Also, this whole prom thing, I asked Erick, he's my boy and I know I would have tons of fun with him. Not a problem. Untill yesterday, ( sigh) his parents may not let him go, which sucks. So maybe that is why I have been all weireded out lately. Ahh, and not to mention that I did not get Prom weekend like I though I would, so I have to work from 10 to 6 on saturday, go to Prom, from 9 to 12, I want to go to after prom, which is from 12 to 4 in the morning, then, I have to work from 7 to 3 on sunday. So I'll will most likley be running on caffine and sugary products to keep awake, lol.
I have to take these 2 huge test for the BYU thing, which I have not studied for, which is way bad... I'm getting a little stressed over everything that is happening, but it's not that big. My goal is to take them tomorrow, and hopefully pass.
Jose left yesterday to Texas for his brothers wedding. So before he left we all watched house of daggars, and YES i did cry in the end, it was soooo sad, he came back for her... aww I hate movies that are so sweet and romantic and make dorks like me cry. But later on as I was leaving, Jose got really sad, and he got all teary, which made me sad. He made it seem like he was never ever going to see me again. Wow he really does have strong and pshycotic feelings for me. Lol. Well I gotta go now, off to a great day in school, watching a movie and eating sushi.

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